Ten reasons I hate Naruto

1- it's a Really Bad Dub. Poorly edited and dumbed down for American youth. Actually, this bothers me about a lot of Americanized anime in general. Too often a crap company like 4Kids Entertainment gets hold of the rights to something that, in its original format, could deal with some mature themes and sensical storylines. However, as is referenced in this comic, the American company has a tendency to strip away character development and storylines with meaning in favor of marketability and Fox. When it comes to Naruto, let me simply preface my experience with the series by saying that I own the first seven volumes of the manga and have seen the episodes of the anime that corelate with what I've read. Maybe they did it in the original anime, too, but it is WAY kid-gloved, even in the first story arc. People die in that series, a lot, and I don't think I remember one moment of actual thought toward what was going on in the show. Everything was glossed over. "Oh, he's not dead, he just went away for a long time after being stabbed in 37 places."
2- those damn headbands. They look stupid and people buy them anyway. Seriously, you are not a ninja by putting a metal plate on a piece of cloth and wearing it around. Actually, the costumes in general bother me. No ninja would wear fluorescent orange, for one thing, and it's impossible to get any reading on the time period because while half of the characters look like 12-century rejects, the rest are planted firmly in the 1980s or the middle of the Emo craze.
3- terrible voice acting. I don't care what the Japanese OVA sounded like, cast for both character accuracy and a palateable voice. This bothers me the most in the title character. "SAUCE-KAY. HEY, SAUCE-KAY! LET'S GO KICK SOME BUTT! HAH HAH HAH!" I want to punch whoever it was that did that voice, and whoever cast her.
4- an unbelievable world. I can suspend disbelief pretty easily, but a bunch of magical 15-year-old ninjas running around murdering people in a weird hybrid of fantasy and modern fiction is just odd. They watch TV and ride giant frogs into battle. What? This also ties into the costume thing.
5- the ridiculous fandom. Everyone from nine to ninety seems to know somebody who is crazy about this crap. Seriously. And the ones who absolutely love it will tell you ALL ABOUT IT. Twice. A day.
6- the fighting. I don't care how much "ninpo" you have, you don't block a four inch blade with another four inch blade. It's stupid and impractical. And yet, all these little kid ninjas are running around having kunai-knife fights like it's a poorly-choreographed community theatre West Side Story up in here.
7- those hand signs. "Hold on guys, gotta focus my Ki and make some shadow puppets!" Honestly, this doesn't bother me in the show. It's the 12-year-old kid who thinks he can whip out some Sexy no jutsu of he just twists his fingers the right way.
8- jutsu in general. Jutsu in Japanese is a prefix that typically means "the art/ way of." So, bijutsu (美術) is the art of making art, and ninjutsu (忍術) is the way of the ninja. I'm no ninja expert (more of a pirate guy) but I feel like both the writers and translators just kind of go nuts with the whole jutsu thing.
9- Sasuke. I hate that little emo kid. Seriously, it's the whole "oh my gosh look at the brooding quiet guy every woman in the series has to fall in love with him despite his almost complete lack of expression because he's just SO HOT!" thing. See also: Edward Cullen.
10- the hype. People treat (or at least did the last time I thought about caring) Naruto like it's some sort of god-given anime that should be cherished. And maybe it is pretty decent, I only watched a few episodes. But I will tell you this: it's no Rurouni Kenshin, Cowboy Bebop, or Ghost in the Shell.

So, yeah, I've got some issues. But whatever, everybody has their own likes and dislikes. I'm not saying that if you like the series I won't like you, I'll justask you to refrain from talking about it with me. That is all.